Are you struggling to communicate with your spouse? Do you find difficulties getting on the same page? Then couples counseling is for you. Couples counseling is a form of therapy in which both partners come in (or see a therapist virtually) to work through challenges, understand their relationship better, and develop healthier ways of relating to one another. It does not have to be dramatic or the end of the relationship, but can address many different relationship issues. Counseling can benefit a relationship at any stage. Couples can choose to come in before a big, life-changing event like marriage, moving in together, having children, etc. Many believe that couples counseling is only needed when there are issues, but that is not true. It can greatly help a relationship to seek counseling before problems get out of control. Our therapists use specific therapeutic techniques and interventions to support each couple's goals.
Two types of couples therapy we offer here at Towler Counseling LLC is Gottman and EFT.
Gottman method - This method involves addressing areas of conflict and equipping you and your partner with problem-solving skills. It aims to improve the quality of friendship and the level of intimacy between you and your partner. In his New York Times bestselling book, “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work,” Dr. John Gottman writes, “Although you may feel your situation is unique, we have found that all marital conflicts fall into two categories: Either they can be resolved, or they are perpetual, which means they will be part of your lives forever, in some form or another.” Gottman says that 69% of marital conflicts are perpetual problems, and these are of particular focus in much of the work performed by Gottman-trained therapists. Our therapists work from a Gottman method and to help couples deal with the perpetual problems. Gottman is a type of therapy that many couples seek. Our therapists will work with you using this model to assist in the relationship conflicts and communication issues.
EFT - Emotion-focused therapy, or EFT, focuses on improving the attachment and bonding between you and your partner. The therapist helps you understand and change patterns that lead to feelings of disconnection. EFT is a short term therapy that lasts from 8-20 sessions and is based on the theory of attachment, the therapeutic conditions of experiential therapy (person-centered therapy), and elements of family systems therapy. The core concepts are the importance of emotions to our survival as humans, the role of emotion in attachment and relationships, and the ways in which attachment can be strengthened to allow for optimal inter-dependency and emotional regulation. Our therapist will work with you on emotional regulation and communication styles.
Frequently Asked questions:
Will my insurance pay for couples counseling? Many insurances will not pay for couples counseling. It would depend on your plan and you would need to call. At Towler Counseling, our couples therapists do not accept insurance. We can offer you a invoice to send to your insurance.
How do I know if I need couples counseling? Communication seems to be lacking between you and your partner, or you are fighting frequently. If you find that you are unsure of where the relationship is going. Has there been infidelity in the relationship? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then it is time to speak with a therapist.
What will happen in couples therapy? A therapist gathers information regarding the relationship during the first session. The therapist will help you and your partner decide what you want going forward, then give you strategies to reach those goals. Whether this means parting ways or figuring out what it’ll take to make the relationship work, a huge benefit of couples counseling can be clarifying your feelings.